"Home is where the heart is, and the soul is free..." Home is what the family makes of the house and all the memories for us to cherish. Changing times, nuclear family structure, working parents, divided responsibility, and not enough time have created distances between individual members living under the same roof. People shift due to financial considerations, better infrastructure, better job opportunities, and social considerations (like a glamorous Hollywood property). A general sense of unsettledness permeates.
Strong family bonds strengthen and act as support systems for families to stick to each other irrespective of distances. As indulgent and distant grandparents, certain means of communication and thoughtful efforts go a long way in cementing the delicate and special bond between the grandparents and the grandchild.
Photographs highlighting special events and shared or fun activities can be laminated or packed in a decorative photo frame and mailed to the children. Photographs are powerful visual memory enhancers and a constant reminder of the good times shared. Planning out vacations to be spent together not only heightens the anticipation of the big day, but also provides interesting topics to talk about during the interim period.
Technology has been the biggest boon for communication. Communication methods apart from the telephone include mobile phones for instant connectivity, video conferencing facilities, Skype connection and, of course, email. This allows loved ones to share memories, talk almost face to face through the video camera, share photos and information, and keeps people connected under most circumstances. For going the traditional way, postal letters filled with handwritten sheets of paper have their own old world charm and sentimentality, which cannot be replaced. With mobility charges at the lowest minimum, talking daily is very much a viable option.
Making individual telephone calls to a grandchild, even a five or ten minute conversation, makes the child feel very special and important. Nurturing this bond can be further enhanced by keeping little notes near the phone filled with details disclosed during the conversations, such as the brace-wearing gangly next door neighbour, what Buddy the dog found in the backyard, who the best teacher is, the A+ on science project, as well as other important activities during the day. It leaves the child feeling that these conversations are important to the grandparent.
Attending the important milestones of the grandchild's life like birthdays, graduations, religious passages, and other events highly valued by the family, call for mandatory inclusion to foster the feeling and bond of togetherness. Experience shows that when grandparents make the effort to love and care for grandchildren who live far away, the kids feel the closeness and it means the world to them.
As they say a person never really dies and the love lives on forever. Holding the trusting hand of a grandchild as you guide them towards maturity, life and its multi-coloured aspects, allows you to live life all over again ... through the eyes, trust, respect and delight of your grandchild.
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